Ask the Mountie

What is the best way to win a woman's heart?

Dear Mountie

What is the best way to win a woman’s heart?

Josh P

Dear Josh

Play the cannibal lottery!

The Cannibal Lottery was established sometime between 1856-1870 when western sailors hit the shores of the south pacific islands Cook on previous travels had named Maundry Islands

The sailors brought a series of western delights, including gambling, syphilis and a container of baked beans, and brought back Bungy Jumping, which enjoyed a brief period of fame in the 1870’s under the name of palm-tree hongalong, only to wither into relative obscurity until being reintroduced by extreme sports enthusiasts a century on.

In the 1860’s when the trade route no longer hit the shores of Maundry the memory of the western visitors lived on, and mixed with local custom resulted in the Cannibal Lottery - where instead of a big monetary award, the lucky winner would receive only the choisest cuts of human flesh.

Yours Truly

Mr Mountie

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