ENTER THE PAGEANT
Uncle Tweed has always, since it’s humble beginnings felt a certain fondness for the Beauty Pageant, which coincidentally was developed by the same crafty Greeks that brought us that other acclaimed competition, the Olympic Games:
“Helen was the daughter of the Greek god Zeus and Leda, who was the wife of Tyndareus. Zeus approached Leda in the form of a swan. Helen was born from this union and she was the sister of the Dioscuri, the twins Castor and Pollux, who were renowned for their bravery and skills at fighting. Helen was renowned as the most beautiful woman in the world. Theseus, who had killed the Minotaur, carried her off as a child but the Dioscuri rescued her. All of the kings of Greece wanted to marry her because of her beauty and courted her. To save conflict between them Odysseus suggested that they let Helen choose and then all agree to protect her husband. She chose Menelaus but was later kidnapped by Paris, the son of Priam and Hecuba of Troy. At Zeus’ command Paris had been the judge at a beauty contest and had to choose which of the goddesses Hera, Athene, or Aphrodite was the fairest. He chose Aphrodite who had promised him the most beautiful woman in the world for his wife. He carried Helen off which did not please Menelaus and so the Greeks set sail to Troy. The Trojan war lasted ten years.”
However, recent years steady decline in age of the participating ladies has done nothing for the reputation of the pursuit.
As Uncle Tweed is sure you all agree, children should be heard but not seen, which is why they are best on radio.
Uncle Tweed was, in the context outlined above, thrilled to find out that somewhere in the world, the mature candidate is given a chance to participate in the noble pursuit:
Ladies and Genlemen, welcome to the Mrs Ohio Beauty Pageant!
“No talent competition, no swimwear and no experience is necessary.
If you are ready to celebrate marriage & achievements, then continue reading …
The 2000 Mrs. Ohio(TM) International Winner received:
- Her expense paid trip to Pigeon Forge, Tennessee represent the Buckeye State at MRS. INTERNATIONAL PAGEANT August 2000
- Her official Mrs. Ohio(TM) Crown & Banner
- A beautiful floral presentation bouquet from BARTZ VIVIANO FLORIST
- Autograph cards, stationary & business cards Book - Standing Firm Written and Signed by Dan Quayle
- A complete hair & make up consultation and over from Mary Johnson, Owner WILLOW CREEK SALON (Up to $200.00)
- Autographed photograph of Clint Eastwood A One Thousand Dollar Gift Certificate towards national competition gown from Peggy Russell & SUZIE LEE FASHIONS (Canton, Ohio)
- 1 year supply of Jan Tana Tanning Essentials Value $500.00
- A $300.00 Gift Certificate ($150.00 for Product & $150.00 Consultation) from THE PLATINUM LINE COSMETICS / Lasting Impressions
- A $300.00 Gift Certificate from GALLIPPO’S INC. Northwest Ohios’ Source for fashion, Wauseon
- A photo shoot and color for the national program book from NANCI FRAZER (Mrs. Ohio(TM)1997) STUDIOS (Value $215.00) ARBONNE INTERNATIONAL,
- A complete professional collection of natural cosmetics, skin care & nutrition for her trip to Mrs. International (Value $200.00)
- Cortland Deluxe Portable 5-inch Color Television
- A Gift Basket of Beauty Products from MRS. US 1998 - Lisa Moser (Mrs. Ohio(TM)1998) Value $150 REJUVENIQUE Facial Toning System The Mask, Custom Gel, Battery ($ 99.99 value)
- A 16 x 20 Charcoal Portrait from Detroit Artist PAUL MADDEN of ALL ART INC.
- The 2000 Pageant Video (television production & full versions)
- National Aerobic Wear Competition Outfit - LASTING IMPRESSEIONS (Value up to $70.00)
- A Mrs. Ohio(TM)International Photograph Plaque (including 5 x 7 photo) of her crowning moment!
- Traveling Butler Gum Pulse Battery Operated Toothbrush ANTHONY E. NOWAK, D.D.S./Spring Valley Dental (Value $30.00)
- Black velvet evening purse with gold & crystal clasp $30.00
- A one year membership for SHAPELY LADY, INC. & SANDRA HYDE, Mrs. Ohio(TM)1992
- Mrs. Ohio(TM)International 2000 and her husband will enjoy the 2001 Mrs. Pageant weekend as our guests.
- Wakeby Forest Black Crystal clip earrings ($60.00)
- “City of Toledo” Official Goblet 100 Pocket Mini-Max Photo Album with Mrs. International Crown Logo
- A romantic dinner, champagne & chocolate for two and an evening as overnight guests of THE INN AT VERSAILLES, Ohio A three package visit from Karen Kontak FULL TRAINING, Toledo,
- A beautiful mantle clock from RUTH & STEVE COFFMAN, Mrs. Mr. Ohio 1989 ($70.00)
- METROPOLITAN DISTRIBUTING COMPANY Gift Packet including a Large Royal Blue Miller Lite Corduroy Varsity Jacket, XL Black Reserve Golf Shirt, Molson Ice Polar Beach Party Cap, Red Dog Fanny Pack & sunglasses ($100.00)
- Crane 100% Cotton Fiber Purple Bordered Invitations-30 (45.00)
- A Full Set of Acrylic Nails from BY PAMELA, Sylvania, Ohio Framed Heart Artwork ($25.00 value)
- Black Traveling Crown Case (18.00)
- White Linen Covered Guest Book $15.00
- Hair Caterpillar by Becca Bows & Crystal Cactus Pin $15.00
- A beautiful floral presentation bouquet from BARTZ VIVIANO FLORIST A complete hair & make up consultation and over from Mary Johnson, Owner WILLOW CREEK SALON (Up to $200.00)
- “Udderly Smooth” Udder Cream from Redex Industries - Salem, Ohio
- Book - ‘Let’s Play Doctor’
Uncle Tweed is , like anyone in his shoes would, cursing the day he was born a man outside state of Ohio.