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Do you put out? Can I see a picture of you?

Dear Mountie, I think your answers are so witty & insightful.

I have to say they kind of turn me on. Now I don't know if it is the whole fantasy of men in uniform or what, but I was wondering if you might be gay.

If you are, do you put out? Can I see a picture of you?
Horny when I think of you.

Dear Horny
Thank you for the flattering remarks.

Due to contractual obligations I am unable to answer any questions regarding my sexual orientetion, as my editor feels it might harm my readership figures if I commit myself one way or the other.

Regarding the second part of your question I would really need to see a recent picture of you, dear Horny, before I make any statement regarding "putting out"

Yours Truly
Mr Mountie


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